Dating Follies Part Deux

The other day I talked about my friend who went on her first date in the city after a year and a half.  She reported back to me and said that it might have been one of the best dates ever, and also very much like a scene out of the movie.  Here is how it went...

They had dinner outside at a cafe and then went for a walk on the Lower East Side.  Went to a little bar and played darts.  Stumbled upon Washington Square Park and sat on a bench by a fountain.  They talked the whole time, and I imagine that they stared into each other's eyes longingly as the sun went down... Sorry, got a little carried away there!

There was only one problem...He mentioned something about them "dating" and that he was so happy to have met her because he was losing hope in all women, which means that he wants to get a little more serious than my friend might be ready for at the moment.  He seems to her to be a complete romantic and a little too mushy mushy (her words exactly).  She thinks that she got a little bit scared off by this... I know that she got scared!

This is something that one too many girls do when a guy starts to like us.  We always like what we cannot have, we like the chase (as do men).  For example, my friend was head over heals for this guy.  She loved his rocker looking long hair, his smile, he seemed funny and sincere.  Now, that he has shown a little interest, she isn't sure about his hair, and he might be a little too clingy and romantic for her.  This is what we do as women, we over analyze the situation and the person until we make ourselves not like them anymore - and this is where we get into trouble.  I have done this numerous times.  I don't really like a guy until he stops calling (it gets to be an issue).  Until I actually grow up, and decide that I'm done with this silly game, then I will realize to stop doing this and like a guy when he is around.

That is why this whole idea of dating is so complicated.  I think that there needs to be this balance of the right give and take (or the chase).  Without this balance, either the girl or the guy, gets thrown off.  Thankfully I have a very smart friend.  She has decided to stop (or try to stop) analyzing the situation, enjoy her time with him, and see where things go.  If he says that he wants something more serious than she is ready for, she will be honest with him and say how she is really feeling, no matter how she feels.  I wish her luck :)